“Because the thing about comparison is it robs you of gratitude because immediately it’s like, well look at that person’s garden… but you didn’t have a garden before, bro!” – Ezra Collective

No matter how hard we try, it’s way too easy to slip into the comparison trap—whether it’s with people we grew up with, complete randoms we follow on Instagram, or just whatever society has decided we “should” be doing by now. I’m the worst for this. But honestly? It never actually makes you feel good. Like, when has comparing yourself to someone else ever left you thinking, “Wow, I feel amazing about myself now”? Exactly. So I’m working on breaking the habit—slowly but surely.

Am I where I expected to be at this point of my life? Absolutely not. Do I think that matters? No.

So, here I am—a woman in her early 30s—watching a lot of my friends do the whole “grown-up” thing: settling down, getting married, popping out babies. And yeah, I’d be lying if I said I never get that little pang of, “Oh… that’s not me.” But then again, I’m also not entirely convinced that’s where I even want to be right now.

Me, I’m basically starting over for, oh, I don’t know… the millionth time? (Consistency is overrated anyway.) Is the whole thing thrilling or terrifying? In all honesty I think it’s a bit of both. I am starting to see what the next few months are most likely going to look like though and that is a good feeling, the plan is starting to come together. The last couple of months have been pretty nerve wracking.

The funny thing about all of this is, if you scrolled through my social media right now, you’d probably think I’m out here living the dream. And to be fair, I have had a pretty great summer—beaches, sunshine, lots of time outside, great outfits, the whole vibe. But what those little squares don’t show? The stress, the ugly crying, and the days where I feel completely useless. Because let’s be honest, none of this was the plan for this summer.

What the last couple of months have shown me is just how important it is to take time out to reflect and relax, because it really does make a difference to how you feel…and how you interact with those around you.

For all my fellow comparison addicts out there (hi, it’s me 🙋‍♀️), here’s a little reminder: what you see online is just the highlight reel. Even if someone sprinkles in a few “real” or not-so-glam snaps, there’s still a whole lot that never makes it to the grid. No one—and I mean no one—has the perfect life, or has it all figured out, no matter how polished their feed looks.

The messy bits? The doubts, the stress, the tear-streaked mascara moments? Yeah, those don’t exactly scream “post me on Instagram.” But they’re just as real. At the end of the day, all of us are just winging it, trying to build a life that makes us happy and fulfilled.

So when you catch yourself scrolling and thinking someone else’s life looks flawless, flip the script. Take inspiration if you want—but don’t waste your energy comparing. Honestly, what’s the point?

Until next time,
M x